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I have thought often of selling this house and land and moving someplace else. We talked about it yesterday and I totally lost comtrol. Even now I am in tears. This is so much more that a house. The land has held generations of peoples and creatures. The walls have heard my cries and seemed to hold me when there was no one else there to do that.
It is hard to keep up with all that one must do to keep a house upright and healthy. Tonya does most of it. I work and pay the bills. We see things differently. I come home, close the door behind me and relax. Are the days really gone when people had homesteads? I so wanted this place to always be here for my children and theirs. But I know that they would never want it. So I guess now we work on doing things on the house that will make it sell well someday. Why am I so totally attatched to it and why is it breaking my heart to think of someday leaving.
Nothing lasts forever. Nothing should I guess.


Nursing story: EMS brought us a 16yr. old female, hyperventalation complaing of chest pain. She was a member of our juvenile department's boot camp program. She had a diagnosis awhile back of NEUROCARDIOGENIC SYNDROME. After obtaining an EKG and determining that this girl was not dieing, I went to look up this syndrome. "Syncope, hyperventilation symptoms, fainting..." A fancy name for "I need attention."
Then here comes mother......She wanted a blanket, she wanted her daughter to have something for her chest pain. "Don't you know she has a heart condition?"
"That may be so, but what's going on today has nothing to do with her heart." Now you would think this would be good news. Mom wasn't pleased. I brought the pt. an ibuprofen. Mom thought that wasn't strong enough. I said it was the perect medicine for the problem. I told mom that her daughter needed to eat breakfast in the mornings, stop smoking which was by the way against the law, and to get plenty of exercise. Mom thought she should be excused from working out in boot camp. I said, "No, it is probably just what she needs."

I thought as mother and daughter angrily left ER.....I would love to look the Dr. in the eye that gave that girl the fancy diagnosis and call him or her a coward. They I looked at the diagnosis our Dr. had given her: Costrochondritis. No one seems to have thime for the truth anymore.